Stress

So with less than two weeks until the wedding, I’ve been really feeling the pressure to make everything go perfectly. I feel like when that inevitable thing goes wrong, it sure as hell better not be because I overlooked a critical detail. Only freak accidents and babies allowed.
I feel crazy. If I don’t write something down as soon as I think of it, it’s likely to be forgotten moments later. If I’m lucky it will come back so I can write it down then. Or Brandon (aka Life-Saver) will remind me.
The funniest thing is, though, yesterday he thanked me for being so organized. Which, I guess, I really am. I made myself a ‘master’ to-do list, and then used post-its to do daily lists and keep myself focused and a tiny bit less overwhelmed. And best of all, for the most part I’ve been getting each list done every day, so even though there’s a new list of things to do in the morning, I can still feel accomplished. If only for a few moments.
My diet is struggling at best, though. And my sleep is erratic and filled with dreams of my lists and random things that could go wrong. Like forgetting to shave. Speaking of forgetting: forget exercising. Although that might help me chill too. (Putting ‘go for a walk’ on my to-do list now.)
I think I need to make myself a schedule for the day of, with thing like “eat”, “drink water” & “pee” so I can hold it all together though the home stretch.
I’m not sure what else to do to make myself relax. I might go get a massage later this week. Regardless, it will all be over soon. In the best possible way.

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