Beat the Boss

In one week I’ll weigh in for the completion of the Beat the Boss challenge at work. I spoke to one of the ladies in our Indianapolis office and she said that pretty much anyone who lost any weight is going to get $200. Which is pretty sweet, but considering how much I’ve spent on clothes that actually fit, I pretty much need to win this thing in order to actually come out ahead.
I know I went a little crazy when my closet seemed to expire all at once. Everything was so ill fitting, I was embarrassed to dress for work. I’m feeling, more or less, comfortable in my own skin. I’ve been wearing shorts this summer, something I can’t remember doing since I was 17 and discovered capri pants. And even as we speak I’m wearing a dress to work: 2nd time in two weeks. (Pats self on back for starting to follow through with my “slave to fashion” rant from months ago.)
Maybe I’ve gotten a little too complacent, as my weight, diet & exercise routine have all been pretty inconsistent, especially considering the looming ‘deadline.’ And if I’m this lackadaisical today, what is going to happen this fall, this winter, the holidays, and at some point in the future, the wedding? It seems to be a never ending cycle of meeting goals and then trying to find new motivation and more goals for the future.
Maybe I’m just sulking about having to spend every night this week in the gym just to get back to where I was before my trips to Chicago and NYC.
The crazy thing is, I’m only halfway to where I really should be. I’m not sure how I should feel about that. If I actually make it the rest of the way, I will weigh something like what I did at 16. I guess I’ve always been ok with being a little extra curvy, but now given the choice, I’m not sure. At 120lbs, will people call me too thin?(Even though I know that’s a healthy weight!) Will I care? Will I be able to maintain that weight?
Bleh. Such a daunting prospect, even having come this far. No cheery thought to end this post with, so I’ll just quit my moping and get ready to work out.


2 thoughts on “Beat the Boss

  1. I'm proud of you! You're inspirational. The thought of 130 (my hs weight) freaks me out though. For me that was a size two. I think I'd like a 6 better.

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