hot cereal

I’ve been eating my oatmeal almost every morning for the past year. Still, on a cold, dark, gloomy day like today, I feel especially warmed through while enjoying my breakfast.
It really is one of the more basic human experiences… almost primitive, except for the microwave I cooked it in. I think it’s important to remind myself of the joy in these simple moments, perhaps because it’s far too easy to let little irks and annoyances get us in a foul mood.
On a day like today, a little warmth goes a long way.

A Kiss

You come to me,
Closer, you stand.
Lean in, your breath whispers a melody
Straight to my heart strings.
A kiss comes at me like the whole ocean.
Salty and strong.
I close my eyes, and they are opened
Again, in my mind.
I can find you in the dark easier.
The warmth covers me.
My skin tingles like sunburn.
These are your arms around me.
Falling away, into the cold waters.
The moment ends, I cannot
Let my knees buckle,
Though they will.
Even as you turn to go, your smile
Lingers on like the twinkling of midnight stars.
And the full white moon
In the bluest summer sky.

generation: RUDE

I, for one, was not at all surprised to hear the antics of Kanye or Serena this weekend.
I was almost surprised about Joe Wilson’s outburst during the President’s speech, but reflecting on a summer of unruly town hall behavior, it makes sense in context.

I’m sure, however, there were plenty of people who were shocked. What have these kids (minus Joe) become?

From my perspective, it was the only logical result. We are allowed to voice our every opinion and emotion relatively unchecked, via blogging, Twitter, and various other social networks. If today’s youth can’t help using shortened words learned from txting in their school papers, how in the world will they know when to bite their tongues, or even how to just be polite?

Another culprit here may be the “diva” mentality. I was never so shocked as the first time I heard one of my class mates shouting across the lunchroom, “Yeah, so what? I’m a Bitch! And proud of it!” Seriously, what about that is there to be proud of? I’m all for standing firm when you feel strongly about something. But deliberate cruelty & game-playing? Why are we endorsing this? Unfortunately, this attitude is far from uncommon.

You tell us we can do, say, or be anything, and we will. Even rude.

so this is why you should stick to a sleep schedule

Quarter til one as I’m starting to write this. My mind is racing, unable to land on any one particular thought that will allow me some peace of mind. He went to bed an hour and a half ago, I meant to be right behind.
I keep getting lost in various distractions, miscellaneous interactions, social information & other bright flashing lights I cannot look away from. I’m thoroughly intrigued by people, how they behave towards and apart from each other. I like to meet new people, find out their ticks and quirks, push their buttons when possible.
Brandon is my antithesis, but our juxtaposition has guided me through the past few years. He’s solid when I’m shaky. Calm when I’m on the verge of losing it. Logical when reason has escaped me. Also: shy when I’m bold. Often: content when I’m curious.
All this time he has seen me as someone trustworthy, and so I’ve behaved as such. Sometimes though, I worry. If I continue to meet new people (men), will he continue to be ok with it? Human nature suggests that jealousy is, on some level, inevitable. And, based on previous experiences, once the jealousy starts, there’s nothing I can do about it. Will it come to this?
I really hope not.
I’ve done everything I can think of to be very clear about who I am spending time with and why. I think that’s fair, and he seems content with my behavior. For the time being. Or maybe forever; he is always surprising me with his ability to ‘get’ me.
1:03am
Not bad…

a little more

It’s no secret I’ve been really lucky in life. Even in my worst mistakes, I’ve walked away relatively unscathed. I did manage to learn a few really tough lessons, though. Never ever take advantage of someone who loves you. Set something aside, just in case. Be good to everyone; it will come back around.
But even these lessons are hard to follow all the time. I feel like I’ve gotten a little lazy. I spent too much this year, especially considering my (temporary) pay cut and the medical bills from having my appendix out. The crazy thing is, I gave most of it away. I love to give the perfect gift.
I’m not sure how I feel about karma, but do those things sort of cancel each other out?
Regardless, Christmas will be here before you know it, and I’ll have to be smarter about it.

I’m thinking about another tattoo, to compliment the angel on my shoulder. I’m feeling… a tree.